Post by bronte73 on Sept 15, 2017 20:32:32 GMT -5
My mom and dad were married for 54 years and were tied at the hip. They did just about everything together, and in the last 3-4 months were together almost 24/7 because my mom was my dad's caretaker.
My mom also lost her very best friend about 3 weeks before my dad died. So, the two people she spent all of her time with are gone, and she is really lost. She really didn't' even have time to mourn her best friend because my dad really started to decline around the time Ruth passed away. In fact, I had to go be with my dad in the hospital in Columbus so my mom could attend her friend's funeral and do the eulogy.
She told me she isn't sleeping well the last couple nights, and she isn't eating well because she can't stand cooking just for herself. She ended up going out to eat today because she didn't want to eat at home alone.
My mom is in good health and is a pretty active, lively person. She has a hard time just sitting around doing nothing, so I don't think she'll do very well if she doesn't have something productive to do, kwim.
I suggested volunteering or maybe a little part time job of some kind, but she didn't think anyone would hire her since she's almost 80 (you'd never know it to look at her). She also said she doesn't want to be committed to something if the weather gets bad and she has to get out or whatever. I thought maybe she could be a sub at the offices at school - just fill in if someone is out. She was an office manager before she retired, and she is very computer savvy.
I usually met my parents for coffee every Saturday morning. I went to dinner with my mom on Wednesday and I'll probably add in a mid-week visit of some kind in addition to Saturday morning, but I'm not sure I can do more on a regular basis with all I have going on. I really need to get my side hustle going here this year for a variety of reasons.
My mom does have a very supportive church, but they had a circle of couple friends. She says it's weird now that she is only half of a couple. She said she didn't even know where to sit in church. The people there really do love her and care about her so hopefully, the strangeness will wear off. I really don't think any of the couples will "drop her" for lack of a better term.
Any ideas? She seems very determined not to feel sorry for herself, and she has told me she just needs to get used to it. But she's really struggling. I'm a little concerned about her not eating/sleeping very well. Any ideas would be helpful. It's just me so it's not like I can bounce ideas off of siblings or get anyone to help me. Fortunately, my oldest Brock is a college student and the college is across the street from where my mom lives. He stops there 3 days a week and she feeds him! lol I think they both benefit from that.
My mom also lost her very best friend about 3 weeks before my dad died. So, the two people she spent all of her time with are gone, and she is really lost. She really didn't' even have time to mourn her best friend because my dad really started to decline around the time Ruth passed away. In fact, I had to go be with my dad in the hospital in Columbus so my mom could attend her friend's funeral and do the eulogy.
She told me she isn't sleeping well the last couple nights, and she isn't eating well because she can't stand cooking just for herself. She ended up going out to eat today because she didn't want to eat at home alone.
My mom is in good health and is a pretty active, lively person. She has a hard time just sitting around doing nothing, so I don't think she'll do very well if she doesn't have something productive to do, kwim.
I suggested volunteering or maybe a little part time job of some kind, but she didn't think anyone would hire her since she's almost 80 (you'd never know it to look at her). She also said she doesn't want to be committed to something if the weather gets bad and she has to get out or whatever. I thought maybe she could be a sub at the offices at school - just fill in if someone is out. She was an office manager before she retired, and she is very computer savvy.
I usually met my parents for coffee every Saturday morning. I went to dinner with my mom on Wednesday and I'll probably add in a mid-week visit of some kind in addition to Saturday morning, but I'm not sure I can do more on a regular basis with all I have going on. I really need to get my side hustle going here this year for a variety of reasons.
My mom does have a very supportive church, but they had a circle of couple friends. She says it's weird now that she is only half of a couple. She said she didn't even know where to sit in church. The people there really do love her and care about her so hopefully, the strangeness will wear off. I really don't think any of the couples will "drop her" for lack of a better term.
Any ideas? She seems very determined not to feel sorry for herself, and she has told me she just needs to get used to it. But she's really struggling. I'm a little concerned about her not eating/sleeping very well. Any ideas would be helpful. It's just me so it's not like I can bounce ideas off of siblings or get anyone to help me. Fortunately, my oldest Brock is a college student and the college is across the street from where my mom lives. He stops there 3 days a week and she feeds him! lol I think they both benefit from that.
She's pretty frugal though and they own their house. 
Anyway, my mom is doing okay - still struggles with being alone, and we have the holidays to get through. That will be a challenge. She's always been somewhat prickly about the holidays anyway, so we'll see how it goes. Also, I have the issue that my dad's bday is on Christmas Eve and I certainly am not going to leave my mom sitting home alone on Christmas Day, but we do have my husband's family too (and they aren't much for mixing with anyone else - not mean, just the way they are). 